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Showing posts from April, 2018

Practicing 'Ocean Optimism'

Today, the weather suits my mood. There is dense fog covering the harbor, and rain has been coming down in buckets. Perfect afternoon to stay inside and watch "Farming in Bermuda". Unfortunately, I tuned in at the tail end of the show.  I am very intrigued by the agricultural challenges here- the lack of available farm land, the need to import so much produce, the public health ramifications of not having easy access to affordable, healthy food. Coming from a community like ours, where fresh fruits and veggies are superfluous, it is hard to fathom the reliance on imports. But that is a way of life here. Everything is imported. It all comes in cargo crates- thus, prices are high. Bermuda is a volcanic island, affectionately known as "The Rock". Rather than vistas of open farm fields, there are lush green hills on limestone rocks, and open vistas of the sea. I t is much different from the East End.  I had a flawless trip from JFK. We landed 3o minutes early, pre

"Spend the rest of your life being happy" -Marlys

Life is short. Having recently lost my mother (and best friend), I feel like a kite in the wind- not sure whether I will fly high, or crash and burn.  Caregiving was the most important and meaningful experience of my life- far exceeding any other aspirations I could ever seek. Yet, the pain of the closed chapter hurts. Grief is nothing one can rush through. That has been glaringly obvious. Give me more time to nap. Allow me to isolate. Pour me a chardonnay. Help me avoid seeing all of the foods in the supermarket that my mom loved... As I look at photos of my mom, and replay her wish for me to spend the rest of my life "taking care of number one", I am challenged to determine what that entails, exactly. Becoming accustomed to sacrificing time and energy and emotion, I am in now in a self-imposed rehab, attempting to figure out which gifts of mine to give the world next.  Recently, my family took a much needed vacation to Bermuda, my "happy place"- to recharge aft