It's Beginning to Look A lot like Christmas!

Every now and then, we all should take time away to look at our own culture with binoculars. Looking at the United States, from Bermuda- its island neighbor, I have gained increasing clarity about my values over the past year. Why should it be any different at Christmas time? Perhaps to the contrary, it is more profound.

As time goes by, we complain more and more about the commercialization of what is, in fact, a religious holiday- Christmas. Come November 1st, we are bombarded with holiday ads, stacks of unsolicited catalogs, Christmas music from every singer that has ever taken a breath, and pressure- to buy, to give, to decorate, to prepare, to bake, to look glamorous... In fact, there are so many kinds of subtle pressure on us, that we become a bit brainwashed, I think.

Nina and I were raised in a household that revered the Christmas season, with a special focus on Scandinavian traditions. Our family has always held a traditional Christmas party, and made our home as festive as possible- with treasures collected over decades. Like many, we grew up listening to classic Christmas music- and still lean back to it, with a few exceptions. A little Michael Buble can make our spirits bright, for sure; he has joined the elite group of Andy, Bing, Ella, Frank, etc.

Our parents taught us how to be creative at Christmas- thinking a lot about what to give, the art of writing a clever tag on a gift to create mystery, and  how to wrap a gift that would be just as appreciated, if it were left unopened.

My mom recounted a classic story to me, of a Christmas in Colorado, back in the 1950's- when she and my dad had just met. He was in the Air Force and my mom was working for the Gorsuch legal firm (that would ultimately produce our recent Supreme Court justice). She was a file clerk. 

Back then, my father had to donate blood in order to have enough money for the Christmas sweater he wanted to give to my mother. In those days, the essence of the season had a purity about it, that has now been overshadowed by atrocities such as Black Friday and Cyber Monday. I wish that I had lived in that simpler era- yet, I feel it here in Bermuda. Here, I do not feel the frenzy. 

This year is a bit mind-boggling for my sister and I. Our parents are in Heaven. Nina's husband is no longer in our "circle", nor is his side of the family. Our family is so much smaller. My sister even lost her best friend this year. So, it is just the four of us- Nina, Peter, Daisy and myself. Shocking, how much life can change in one year. 

Having experienced a lot of loss this year, we are facing sad anniversaries and grappling with what to do vs. what not to do, and whom to please... I think we need to just be together and "wing it," as Marlys would say. Although we may not bring out my mother's Christmas ornaments this year (self-preservation), the aroma of Swedish meatballs will fill the house. We will buy a Christmas tree. We are Marlys' legacy- so we will carry the torch, as best we can; it will be challenging and sad. We will play The Westminster Abbey Boys Choir and Joan Sutherland- in memory, this year.

Coming to Bermuda in advance of Christmas has been a breath of fresh air- not just because the air is warmer. It has served as a 'reset button' during this season of holiday madness. I feel like a refugee from commercial bombardment and forced gaiety. 

I can dwell in a bit of quiet authenticity, which is a respite. For example, when one shops for cookie cutters In Bermuda, there is a basket full of cutters of The Cross- along with the others that we traditionally love to use. After being here, I can forgive myself for going home and throwing out all of my Christmas catalogs! Yay!

Back at home, we have easy access to everything. We can decorate our homes, our yards and our communities to the hilt- even to the extent that we wind up competing with others. On a typical day in 'the Hamptons', we can travel to Home Goods, K-Mart, and a choice of nurseries- with trees of every kind, garlands of every kind, lights of every kind- and enough Christmas decorations (for every taste imaginable) to fill Times Square. If one likes to be traditional, that is easy. If one likes to be tacky, that is easy. If one wants to be coastal chic, that is easy, too! Here, just one big, red Christmas bauble can cost you $30.

Arriving in Bermuda, I half expected the same manicured style of holiday decorating that we have at home- with the airport glitzed-out in New York style. I do not know why I expected such; perhaps because I love Bermudian style, and eagerly anticipated Christmas trees in PINK.  

Instead, I was greeted by an inflatable Frosty the Snowman, and Mariah Carey singing "All I want for Christmas is You"- the latter being a bit of a "Love Actually" moment. My Guardian Angel was my DJ... If there were to be a perfect arrival soundtrack for me, who is clearly smitten with this island, this was it.

Over the past week, I have been taken- once again- by the utter minimalism that exists on this island- so close to America. While we take for granted the "muchness" that surrounds us, it is different here. After all, every live Christmas tree in Bermuda arrives by cargo ship! Can you imagine not being able to go to the nursery on the day after Thanksgiving? Bermudians must wait for the MV Oleander from New Jersey to bring in fresh trees. Oh, how I would love to be on the docks that day- to welcome every tree, and thank it for its sacrifice.

From my very arrival at Salt Kettle, I have noticed a very fundamental and tasteful idea- decorating everything with red bows. Wherever I go, I see bows! It makes everything look like a gift just for me! How easy, how lovely, how minimalist, how Bermudian.

One bow, in particular, gave me a good laugh. There it was, on a lovely wooden door- near Salt Kettle, presumably to welcome guests. Yet, right above it was a sign: BEWARE OF DOG! So... which one is it?! Come in, or stay away? How funny! A secret tip I have learned from Bermudians is that many island folk are fearful of dogs. Therefore, rather than investing in high tech security, it is sometimes sufficient to deter the rare criminal with a BEWARE OF DOG sign. It leaves guests (expected and unexpected) on their toes!

Wreaths are also noticeably popular here- whether they are tiny, and made of Holly, or larger ones hung from buildings, such as the characteristically PINK Gibbons and Company department store. They are so classic and timeless. I especially loved the sight of a fresh wreath on Jane's pool gate; how terribly inviting ... 

Christmas lights are another story. Although many Bermudians used to decorate their colorful homes with Christmas lights, the price of electricity in Bermuda has caused this tradition to wane- sadly. 

At home, we take this for granted- the cost of illuminating an outdoor tree, or outlining our entire home in flashing lights is not a second thought. Here, decisions about decorating are much more prudent- and with good reason.

I cannot speak of lights, without a nod to the two ends of Bermuda. While at Dockyard, I observed a wonderfully simple way to liven up an outdoor environment- by using up-lighting in red or green to illuminate a tree, a wall, a fortress- just about anything. No need to cover a tree in light- because the few bulbs at the bottom produce a lovely shadow and/or silhouette. 

Likewise, in St. George, the strings of lights that traverse the streets provide an incredible and charming allure- despite how simple they are. Town Hall, to the contrary, is dressed up like a Gingerbread House- this is a wonderful POP to enjoy in King's Square.

It dawned on me, that Bermuda Tourism (or the electric company) might want to have an annual contest that would allow the winners to have free Christmas lights all season. After all, it is the season of light, and light is magical- especially in this setting.

Naturally, with a love of design, I was dying to go shopping in Hamilton to look at Christmas decor! Once again, I headed to the pharmacy first- The Phoenix. Here, I found several things that struck my fancy- including Christmas balls in muted shades of Bermuda's Periwinkle clouds and Pink Sand. I also found a fabulous hot pink Christmas ball garland that I was tempted to bring home (Nina would kill me) until I looked at the price tag...I think it cost $45! Yikes.

Perusing the Christmas decorations, I was surprised not to see "Happy Christmas"- the traditional phraseology used in Britain, or any mentions of "Father Christmas." Instead, Bermuda has adopted American lingo- most things say "Merry Christmas" and "Santa Claus." 

With that said, Mother England is still represented by walls of Christmas crackers- the kind that you pop open on Christmas eve- along with Christmas puddings and Quality Street candies, which seem to be quite the rage. They look like little gifts- each one of them!

Thus far, my Christmas "warm up" has been an experience of contentment. Whether it was seeing a door in St. George decorated with a roll of tinsel (that we at home use on packages) or realizing that one can (and should) put fairy lights on a live bouquet, it is magical to see what can be done with less.

I think that American society would do well to stop and take stock of how much we all have. Here in Bermuda, people share things. Consignment shops and thrift stores are popular. On a small island, how much "stuff" does one need? There is literally no room for it all. Might as well enjoy something secondhand.

The other day, Jane took me to a great thrift shop, called The Barn. I thought there might be something fun for my holiday collection, but they were tapped out! Naturally, I found a well-loved Christmas ornament of TRIGGER, aka Island Kitten! Thinking it might be a bad omen, I left it behind- with a chuckle. 

Later that evening, one of the guests at Salt Kettle, Karen, surprised me- having heard of my intrigue in island thrift shops. Into the lounge she came, with a small box of mixed Christmas treasures that had been left on the side of the road! (Indeed, she had to get Eli to pull their moped over "onto the side of the road", which is not easy to do in Bermuda!)

In the mystery box were a smattering of things that someone wanted to pass along, but not dispose of. Karen and I plugged in two strings of Las Vegas-worthy holiday lights, and pulled out a set of four sparkly Christmas trees for place cards (yes, there were four),  and two ornaments- each of an angel in a glass dome, holding a heart. An angel is always a sign to me... I miss my mom so much, it hurts.

I said to Karen, "You do not want these?" She said, "Oh no! Those are for you! Whatever you do not keep, I will take to The Barn!"

An angel for me, and an angel for Nina.

How symbolic is that?